Global warming update

Katie Couric: I feel bad not reporting the news of record low temperatures in Macon.
Nancy Pelosi: You did good. That would’ve hurt our chances of passing the cap and trade bill in the Senate. Right, Barbara?
Barbara Boxer: If you are talking to me, please call me senator.
Couric: Did you ever wonder if we could be wrong about global warming?
Boxer: Quiet! We’ve worked too hard to get people to buy curly light bulbs and take their own bags shopping. Do you think this outfit makes me look taller?
Couric: I can’t just ignore the truth. What would Walter do?
Pelosi: Let’s come up with a diversion. We need more greenhouse gas villains.
Boxer: What is greenhouse gas, anyway? I heard it’s just water vapor. That doesn’t sound very harmful. Actually, it’s good for my complexion.
Couric: Maybe I could do a two-hour documentary on The China Syndrome. I thought the acting was much better in that than The Inconvenient Truth.
Pelosi: I got it! We need to go after methane gas. Something stinky and flammable.
Boxer: Doesn’t methane come from pig farts?
Couric: Does methane make a lot of noise, because one time I heard Walter cut the cheese and it was quite a blast.
Pelosi: I saw this PBS special that showed methane gas just naturally bubbling out of oceans and lakes. They even showed where snow can burn in Alaska.
Boxer: Some of my best friends are Eskimos.
Couric: I’m confused about all this global warming stuff. It sure was easier when we were negative about everything and didn’t have to defend things.
Pelosi: I got it! Let’s call Joe Biden. He’ll find a way to blame Bush for all this.
Boxer: Joey is up in Hyannis Port helping Teddy protest the installation of windmills that block the ocean view at his beachfront compound.
Pelosi: What about Al Gore? He invented the Prius.
Couric: Al is still at the Michael Jackson tribute eating leftovers.
Boxer: Just forget it, Katie. It will get warmer in Georgia. Those people just cling to their guns and religion, anyway.